when they all fall
like a million raindrops
falling from a blue sky
kissing your cares goodbye
they all fall
like a million pieces
a ticker tape parade high
and now you're free to fly
--newsboys.
archive
tunes
+god of wine - third eye blind
+understanding in a car crash
- thursday
+in years to come - thrice
+no me ames
- jennifer lopez/marc anthony
+take me away - lifehouse
+sleeping weather
- small brown bike
+sing for the moment - eminem
+thank you - the katinas
+gossip folks - missy elliot
+landslide - dixie chicks
+miss you - aaliyah
+better than this
- onelinedrawing
+swiss army romance
- dashboard confessional
+letter to myself - furthermore
+Wanksta - 50 cent
+what it is to burn - finch
+ghost man on third
- taking back sunday
+satisfaction - eve
+pride war
- further seems forever
+joe's sick - slick shoes
+without you - LaRue
+this bitter pill
- dashboard confessional
-- Stay silent about your inner conflicts, and you'll end up speaking them alone. So speak up. --
Sunday, January 5
happy new years...here's to 2003
Wow, I have not written here for a while. I suppose now that school is starting again that I will be writing more frequently...
I don't understand guys...well people more or less. If you like someone, I think you should just tell the person. I mean, it can make life easier for the two of you. I actually have no idea what I am saying. I'm not frustrated or upset, but I guess I'm satisified somewhat, happy somewhat. At least knowing that he had liked me before is good enough, considering I had never ever thought he would. So the fact that the impossible wasn't impossible, I should be happy with that...and I am... For more than TWO years I liked this guy, TWO whole years. That's a long time, especially for one who just finished high school. I can't say if I still do or not...but I most certainly did before. And throughout the entire two years, I never thought I had a chance, winning the lottery was more likely. growing a third ear was more likely. But the impossible happened. and he did like me...emphasis on DID - considering he then found some other girl and went out with her...and even though they broke up, he's probably madly in love with Alicia. grrrr....
What's wrong with me? Why is it that everytime his name comes up, I feel all wierd (as gay as that sounds), why is it when I see him with another girl, even if on friend-terms, I get all jealous? Why is it that I compare every guy I do get interested in to him, only for them to fail to meet the standards? It' s like I breathe, live, think Andrew. I'm officially insane. a lunatic. crazie. Here's the wierd part - get this...We aren't even compatible. Ha! We're two people with completely different personalities and attitudes. We're so different. I'm insane.
But this isn't some silly little crush, or some high school love. I'm done high school and yet, I still can't stop thinking about him. This all is retarded since he's probably like I said before met some other girl, who is more for him, or not, and crazie about her. and if it is that Alicia chick, I will go postal. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. see postal. =)
I think I have spoken enough. no worries though, everyone will be hearing more about my pathetic life in the future.
ciao. elaine 9:31 PM
